Few Quickies

 DON’T LOOK AT NAKED LADY
Boy 1: Why do you
run from a naked lady?
Boy  2: Becos my mum said that if I look at a naked lady,  I’ll turn
into stone. A part of me is getting hard  already!

 

ARAB MAN
An Arab was being interviewed at a US checkpoint.
‘Your name pls.’?
“Abdul Aziz “
“Sex? “
“Six times a week!! “
“No, no, I mean male or  female! “
“Doesn’t matters, sometimes even camel !”
 
HAPPY MAN
What makes a happy man?
Daughter on the cover of cosmo.
Son on the cover of sports illustrated.
Mistress  on the cover of playboy
and … Wife on the cover of  ”missing
persons”

 

SWIMSUIT
Why was the 2-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the HAIRY section from the DAIRY section.

 

GOOD AMBITION
Teacher: What do you want to become?
Little Johnny: Doctor !!
Teacher: Why?
Little Johnny: Coz its the only  profession where u can tell a woman to
take off her clothes and ask her husband to pay for it.

DENTIST
Woman complaining to dentist: “It’s so painful, I’ll rather have a
baby than have a tooth  removed.”
Dentist: “Make up your mind soon, I’ll adjust  the chair accordingly.”

VIRGIN
An old lady 85; still a virgin, about to die. wanted her tombstone to read :
BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A  VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN.
The engraver shortened it to: ”  RETURNED UNOPENED “